Katrina: Resources and Recovery

Stress, Depression, Katrina and the Holidays

By: Alicia A. Bourque, Ph.D.

Stress, depression and the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina can be difficult to cope with during this holiday season.

For some of us, the holidays can bring unwelcome guests—stress, depression and reconstructing our lives post-Hurricane Katrina. And it’s no wonder. When trying to pull off a season of peace and joy in a city and in neighborhoods that have suffered devastating destruction and loss, you may find yourself facing a number of difficult demands—work; financial strain; parties; shopping; baking; cleaning; being separated from loved ones; living someplace other than your own home; caring for children, elderly parents and family members; unemployment; and scores of other hardships. This may leave you thinking, “Weren’t the holidays supposed to be ‘happy?’”

Although this season will be different than in years past due to changing our attitudes toward being with family and celebrating in the midst of fear and sadness, there are some practical tips to help minimize the stress and depression that often accompany this time of year. You may be surprised that you end up enjoying the holidays more than you thought you would.

Trigger points of holiday stress.

Holiday stress and depression are often the result of three main trigger points and in the wake of Hurricane Katrina these may have been exacerbated to a greater degree. Determining which trigger points apply to you can help you to plan ahead on how to best cope with them.

Listed below are three issues that commonly trigger holiday stress and/or depression:

- Relationships. Conflict or stress may occur in relationships at any time but tensions may be especially heightened during the holidays. In particular, family misunderstandings and conflict can intensify—especially if you have all been living together for the past several months as a result of Hurricane Katrina. Conflicts are inevitable given so many needs and interests to accommodate. On the other hand, you may find yourself especially lonely or sad if you are facing the holidays without the company of your loved ones.

- Finances. Just like your relationships, your financial situations can cause stress at any time of the year. Overspending during the holidays on gifts, travel, food and entertainment can increase stress as you attempt to make ends meet while ensuring that everyone on your shopping list is happy. Given the financial hardship that Hurricane Katrina has left behind, you may have less income to devote to gifts and this can lead to feelings of inadequacy, guilt and sadness.

- Physical demands. The strain of shopping, attending social gatherings, preparing holiday meals and cleaning up the debris in and around your home can wipe you out. You may find that your exercise routine and healthy sleeping habits have taken a back seat to running errands and doing chores. Feeling exhausted can serve to increase your stress and create a vicious cycle. Taken together, these habits—high demands, stress, lack of sleep and exercise, overindulgence in food and drink—may lead to illness over the winter holidays.

Strategies for coping with holiday stress.

When your stress level is at an all-time high, you may find it difficult to regroup and get centered. There are steps that you can take to help prevent feeling overwhelmed and out of control. Try these strategies:

- Acknowledge your feelings. If you have been emotionally affected either directly or indirectly by the devastation of Hurricane Katrina, realize that it is normal to feel sadness and grief. You may want to take time for yourself to “have a good cry” or to express your difficult emotions in other healthy and adaptive ways (e.g., journaling, counseling, etc.). Trying to force yourself to be happy just because it is the holiday season may not be the healthiest way to use your energies at this time. Have compassion for yourself if you are not in a celebratory mood—you’re not the only one.

- Seek support. If you feel down or isolated, seek out your loved ones, family members or community, religious or social services. These resources can offer support and companionship. If your extended family is not able to gather together at this time, try to find new and creative ways to celebrate with each other from afar, such as sharing pictures, emails or video recordings. Also, remember that you do not have to force yourself to attend parties. If you anticipate such occasions to be painful, honor your need to celebrate this season in your own special way.

- Prepare yourself for family stressors. Although you may be excited about spending time with your family over the holidays, you may not be looking forward to spending A LOT of time with them. If you anticipate that you will have to deal with a meddling or overbearing parent/sibling/in-law, etc., try to rehearse a conversation with that person while practicing relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, guided imagery or positive self-talk. When rehearsing, be sure to pay attention to your body language and try to keep a relaxed, open posture. If a family conversation becomes emotionally intense, avoid saying, “you always…” “you never…” or “leave it alone.” Also, you can attempt to counter negative remarks with positive ones. Remember that you can set healthy boundaries and that you do not have to answer every question that is asked of you. If all else fails, remove yourself from the situation with “I need a cup of coffee…to go to the bathroom…etc.”

- Stick to a budget and be realistic. Before you go shopping, decide how much money you can afford to spend on gifts and other items. Then be sure to stick to your budget. If you go over your limit, you may feel anxious and tense for months afterward as you struggle to pay the bills. Talk to family and friends about gift alternatives, like exchanging services, baking something, pooling gift money, drawing names or donating to the Hurricane Katrina relief efforts. Talk with family and friends about realistic expectations so everyone understands and is not disappointed later.

- Plan ahead. Schedule specific days for shopping, baking, visiting and other activities. Plan your menus and then make one large food-shopping trip to avoid last-minute scrambles to buy forgotten ingredients. When traveling, allow extra time so that delays won’t heighten your stress and engage in 10 to 15 minutes of stretching before and during your trip to help prevent stiffness.

- Learn to say no. During this trying time, people will understand if you choose not to engage in certain projects or activities. If you agree to do what you really want to do, then you will avoid feeling resentful and overwhelmed. If it is really impossible to say no to something—your boss asks you to work overtime—try to remove another task from your agenda to make up for lost time.

- Don’t abandon healthy habits. Don’t let the holidays become a dietary free-for-all. Some indulgence is OK, but overindulgence may add to your stress and guilt. Have a healthy snack (peanut butter, oranges, apples, protein bars, veggies) before holiday parties so that you don’t go overboard on sweets, cheese or drinks. Do cut down on caffeine—coffee, tea, colas. You can slow your intake by mixing half-decaf and half-regular coffee to avoid withdrawal headaches. Continue to get plenty of sleep, schedule time for physical activity and take a multivitamin.

- Self-soothe. While you may not have a silent night every night, try to make some quiet time for yourself. Spending just 15 minutes alone, without distractions, can be very refreshing. Find a quiet place for a few moments of solitude, take a nighttime walk and stargaze, listen to soothing music, meditate or find another activity that clears your mind, slows your breathing and restores your calm.

- Seek professional help if needed. Despite your best efforts, you may find yourself experiencing a persistently sad or anxious mood, physical complaints, sleep disturbance, irritability and hopelessness. If these feelings last for several weeks, the staff counselors at the Loyola University New Orleans Counseling and Career Services Center can help. If you are a student, faculty, or staff member who is in need of counseling, the Counseling and Career Services Center offers confidential individual, couples, and group therapy at no charge. You may call 504.865.3835 or come by the Danna Center, Second Floor, Room 208 to schedule an appointment.

Adapted from:

Stress, depression and the holidays: 12 tips for coping.

Found at http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/stress/MH00030

How to Survive Holiday Season Stress.

Found at http://www.uc.edu/psc/sh/SH_SurviveTheHolidays.htm

Updated on December 12, 2005